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Is there something wrong with me?

Jess Engles with her 3 sons

‘Is something wrong with me?'

These are the words that mum Jess Engles started asking herself after the birth of her third baby.

Saying that having 3 babies in 6 years has been a roller coaster ride, is an understatement for Jess.

Like all mums, Jess loves her children but admits that new mum life has been the most physically, mentally, and emotionally challenging time of her life.

For Jess, baby one was a dream. Her intro into motherhood was filled with excitement, visits from family and friends, and a special initial 40 days of postpartum bliss where she chose to stay home to nest and nurture.

Baby two brought more self-imposed pressure on her to breastfeed after quitting the breastfeeding journey early with her first baby. Add in an active toddler who also needed his mum’s love and attention, and life got very hectic very quickly. Her breastfeeding journey was not easy and eventuated in her experiencing a breakdown from the overwhelm of feeds, pumping, tongue ties, and her baby not putting on enough weight.

Then came baby three. This was her unravelling.

Having already had 2 children, Jess (and those around her) assumed that she had everything under control. Because well you’ve done it before right?

But for Jess she was left constantly wondering…. ‘Is something wrong with me?’

At 7 months postpartum Jess experienced post-natal depression. It was during this time that she felt isolated, sad, and overwhelmed. And she had no idea why.

This led her to begin her own healing and self-development journey. She realised that her kids just needed her love, attention, and presence. But to be able to do that she had to tend to herself first.

She had to learn how to love herself again; She had to learn how to be happy and content in her own skin; and she had to begin the process of remembering who she is.

Jess and her boys

Jess is continuing on her own journey of healing and motherhood and is now sharing her experience through a soon-to-be-released podcast. And while there are still (many) moments where it all seems too much, she remembers that every moment is just a drop in the ocean of their lives together as a family.

So what advice does Jess have for anyone out there who is nodding along as they are reading this?

Firstly, if you feel like you’re alone, overwhelmed, sad, or depressed please seek out your GP for medical advice in the first instance. Secondly, trust your intuition. You don’t have to know everything when it comes to being a parent, but you do have to trust your own gut. Listen and trust it. And thirdly, reach out to people. You don’t have to do it all on your own.

At Villagehood Australia, we understand this feeling, this anxiety, confusion and stress. We are here to support you with a Village of understanding mothers who can help you feel balanced, heard and loved.


If you would like to share your story too, please connect with the Villagehood team.

To learn more about Villagehood Australia and the programs we offer, please check our website .

Villagehood Australia is a registered charity with the ACNC and is endorsed as Deductible Gift Recipient (DGR). You can donate to the charity here.


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